The Big Swap - Part 33

~THIRTY THREE~

He gazed at the clock for the umpteenth time and registered what an awfully eventful day it had been. It felt only a couple of minutes ago when Meera had rung him up with an obvious desperation egging at her tone. That had been about thirty minutes into ten in the morning.

And now, it was already four.

"Thank you beta." Meera's Father whispered in the hospital room where they both stood and Kanan flushed with embarrassment.

"Now you're embarrassing me Uncle."

Mr. Modi sighed, and turned towards the patient's bed where Meera's grandmother lay. Old and frail and weak, she didn't bear any resemblance to the venom spewing, heartless and sexist woman he once recalled her to be.

Funny, how age diminished everyone's might.

It had been nothing short of a miracle for Dadi to survive the heart surgery at her age. But his experience, however little it was, told him that this successful surgery meant nothing concrete. Her eighty years plus body was just not well equipped for surviving such a major heart attack.

He'd chosen to keep this extra bit of information from Mr. Modi. He looked paranoid beyond compare, and Kanan had no shame admitting he was scared of Uncle's rattled self. He'd seen too many shocking news lead to fatalities for family members in the hospital to know Mr. Modi was just not ready for it.

Which was astounding, comparing him to his other nonchalant family members.

A family of over fifteen, and only one seemed to care. Even though Meera's Bade Chachu had been one of the two who brought Dadi into the hospital in the first place, he too had disappeared thereafter.

What a shame!

For the first time in the years he'd known Meera, he was actually beginning to understand where she got some of her basic values from. Despite the kind of an impression he had of the Modi residence, Meera's Father had proved, time and again, how different he was. Not the perfect description of a Father, or a son, but a fairly decent man overall.

"You're hiding something from me, aren't you?" he posed cautiously, his bloodshot eyes giving away how stressed he'd spent the last few hours.

As an intern, Kanan had always found fascinating the diplomacy that laced a Doctor's tone when they wished to conceal facts without giving emotion. Like so many other skills, he'd worked on this aspect of himself too and hadn't stopped only until mastering the same.

"I'm not handling her case Uncle, Dr. Kothari is." Which wasn't a lie.

But upon noticing the lines of stress marring Uncle's features, he found himself place a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "He's a very senior doctor Uncle. You have nothing to worry about."

Mr. Modi didn't argue.

Kanan glanced at his watch again and his eyes widened at the time yet again. How long had he been there?

"Uncle, I should get going-"

"-yes of course beta. You've already done more than enough." He was already up on his feet, and before Kanan could even register what was happening, Mr. Modi had gathered him in a tight gratuitous hug.

Awkwardly stiff, he found himself pat his back in consolation.

"By the way Kanan..." he started, as they finally separated from the awkward hug, "...I'm glad that you said yes for the marriage."

Kanan didn't know what to make of that statement. Did he think he'd agreed to marry Meera simply considering it as an arranged marriage proposal or because he was aware of him and Meera from the past?

He felt baffled and tucked his hands into his white coat defensively.

Mr. Modi gave out a soft laugh, and for a fleeting second Kanan saw a splitting image of Meera's hearty chuckle that he so loved, "I know you like her."

Did...did Meera tell him? But what about Vedant?

Heck! Was Meera even going to come to Mumbai in the first place? Or had she decided to cut all ties with her family when they seemed to need her most?

If he truly knew her as well as he thought he did, he was almost certain that she wasn't capable of abandoning her Father in a moment of crisis.

So then where was she?

"I do, Uncle." He found himself admitting softly. What was the point lying about it anyway? "I really like her. But have you guys asked Meera about her opinion?"

"We will soon. But she has no reason to deny."

Oh but she does!

Uncle smiled affectionately. "You've been a part of the family for long enough to know how Meera feels about us...."

Yes, he knew more than he wanted to.

The Modis' had always seemed like a weird lot to him. Not a single soul seemed to give two figs about another in their supposed family, and all seemed to just about tolerate each other to be able to live in the big and fancy house the first-generation grandfather had built much before analysing the number of times he was going to get his wife pregnant.

In the end, the house that would be fancy for about a total of eight to ten inhabitants, had to be shared by his wife, six of his children, their spouses and their children as well. You'd naturally understand his haste with marrying off his daughters.

Despite the tension among the Modis however, they had managed to live under the same roof for years. How Meera had grown up to be so firm with her wanting to leave was something that had always amused him.

Because from what he had gathered, as long as everyone got their share in the overall property, nobody in that family seemed to mind each other's company too much.

Even then, nobody ever showed any signs of concern or affection for another.

But now, Mr. Modi actually looked like he was fond of Meera. The very daughter, he decidedly never supported, never stood up for and rather blatantly ignored during her loneliest and toughest years.

"...you understand what I'm getting at?" Uncle asked.

Kanan gazed down in acceptance.

"...she has her reasons Kanan. And she isn't wrong. She's a great daughter." Kanan must've not been able to contain the shock he was feeling within for he watched Mr. Modi turn a shade of deep red himself after the little confession.

If only he would've said these words to Meera once!

"She just ended up being born into the wrong family."

Kanan blinked without words, sensing he wanted to speak uninterrupted.

"I want you to give her the family she truly deserves Kanan. And I know you're capable of i-"

The door to the room swung open suddenly, and a Nurse popped her head in from the threshold.

"Sorry to disturb you Doctor, but it's time for your evening rounds."

Kanan nodded in understanding, and gestured for her to carry on.

Mr. Modi smiled then, and Kanan took that as his silent cue to leave, his head still reeling with all his words.

How he wished this were reality! How he wished this truly were his conversation with his Father-in-law to be. How he wished her were getting married to Meera for real! Even the thought felt so thrilling and fulfilling.

He'd only placed one hand on the door knob, when he felt the stiffness of the door. Brows knitting with surprise, he put more pressure on the handle than he intended to. The door swung open resultantly, and a figure bumped into his chest rather severely. Stabling his own feet, his hand gripped onto the obviously female palms protectively. And then, when the woman finally looked up from the clumsy fall, he could only nervously gulp.

Her hair shorter than he'd last seen but her eyes still the same shape of doe he found so stunning, Meera gaped at him with surprise.

"Kanan." Her voice was rushed, and the blush creeping onto her face was immediate and obvious.

"Hi." He found himself smile, as Meera's gaze landed on their entwined fingers. This was their first physical touch since after the break up, and the result to him was simply electric. She on the other hand, jerked away from him instantly, and distanced them both like he were a rattle snake that could bite.

The sudden and evidently spontaneous gesture of repulsion from her lead to a painful pang in his chest, and he found his palms roll into fists to conceal the frustration he felt within that instant.

Gulping down his anger, he nodded at her for acknowledgement and made way for the door.

"Kanan I..."

He waited for her to complete, but when no words escaped her lips he replied, "I'm late for my evening rounds Meera."

He was already out of the door and had no expectation of having her tail behind him but,

"Kanan stop." Her hand rested on his shoulder, "I didn't mean to snap away like that. I'm sorry."

Kanan turned towards her with a sigh, already aware of his hopelessly short span of anger with Meera every time in the past.

"Don't say sorry. I...I get what happened. You and Vedant...and then...I..."

She smiled at that, and the next thing he registered was her arms wrapping around his neck tightly.

"I really am sorry. And thank you for everything Kanan. I mean it."

You know that first time you meet your ex after a nasty half-hearted breakup? There's this intense need of wanting to prove a point, the point that you are happy without them. But for those cases where the feelings never quite dissipated, an unconscious part of you wants an aura of awkwardness in the air.

A part of you wants them to be as rattled around you as they once were when you were together. After all, that is only testimony to the fact that somewhere, buried within all the misunderstandings and fights, they still harboured feelings for you. Maybe not as passionate as the past, but feelings, capable of being reignited.

But Meera's intensely friendly hug ended all semblance of awkwardness that they had maintained for the eight years after their messy breakup and Kanan couldn't help but feel completely hollow from within.

Had she really moved on from him completely? Did she really have no romantic feelings for him anymore?

Did they truly have no chance?

... continued The Big Swap - Part 34